Read an extract from Finding Your People by by Alexandra Hourigan and Sally McMullen.
Friendship love languages
Twenty ways to tell your friends you love ’em without saying ‘I love you’
While we personally think it’s important to tell your friends ‘I love you’ every time you see them, you can get more creative than using these three words and eight letters. Or maybe you have the kind of friendship where making a grand declaration of love every time you hang out may feel a bit weird. We don’t judge. Regardless of how you feel about it, there are a bunch of ways to demonstrate your appreciation and love for a friend without saying ily.
1. Ask them to text you when they get home after a night out.
2. Help them pick out an outfit.
3. Watch their favourite movie with them.
4. Ask them if they’ve had any interesting dreams lately.
5. Shit talk their ex/boss/annoying neighbour with them.
6. Offer to do a chore or run an errand they hate for them.
7. Bring them their favourite greasy meal when they’re hungover.
8. Send flowers to them when they’re sad, celebrating or just
because.
9. Compliment them.
10. Share their work wins, milestone moments or really hot selfies
on social media.
11. Buy them a book you think they’d like.
12. Be genuinely excited when they share good news.
13. Show up to events that are important to them.
14. Encourage them to have ‘me time’ if they’re run-down.
15. Send them TikToks that will make them laugh.
16. Write them a heartfelt letter.
17. Ask them for advice.
18. Start a new hobby with them.
19. Organise a holiday, weekend away or road trip with them.
20. Ask them how they’re really doing.
Everyone gives and wants to receive love in their own ways. The only thing that we all have in common is that we all want to love and be loved. If you reflect on your own friendships, we bet you could add heaps of friendship love languages of your own to the list we’ve shared. That’s the beauty of it: there’s no one right way to show your friend that you care about them. It’s also important to remember that not everyone gives love the way they want to receive it. Just because they shower you with thoughtful gifts to tell you they love you, doesn’t mean that’s how they want or expect some platonic lovin’ in return. So pay attention, ask questions and tell your mate that you love them.
Finding Your People
by Alexandra Hourigan and Sally McMullen
A relatable guide to finding, keeping and saying goodbye to friendships, from the twin-flame hosts of the hit podcast Two Broke Chicks.
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